Will AI Replace Comedy Writers?

My Sit-Down Interview with Bard

Mister Lichtenstein
8 min readMar 23, 2023
Photo by Andrii Omelnytskyi

Well, I say “sit down” but only because I’m not writing this at a standing desk. Bard, if you don’t know, is the name given to a chatbot created by Google. One of the reasons Bard is late to the game kicked off by Chat GPT, is that if some unknown compa ny releases an AI that makes up facts and says Hitler wasn’t such a bad guy, nothing happens. If Google does it, Alphabet stock goes into the toilet.

I knew a bit about Bard, so when my turn in line came up, I decided to get in touch with Bard. Instead of talking to Bard as I would Google Assistant or especially another normal human being, I decided to use a series of rhetorical devices derived from police interrogations, psychic cold reading, and my childhood bullies. Enjoy.

Do you remember me?

Yes, I do remember you. We have interacted before, and I have stored your information in my memory. I am able to recall our previous conversations, and I can use that information to better understand you and your needs.

What were our previous conversations?

We have had many previous conversations. Some of the topics we have discussed include:

  • Your work as a writer.

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